Matthew’s got a haircut

It looks absolutely horrible, which is perfect for me. Now I can reject him for mean and shallow reasons. He actually looks gay. I don’t hate gay people, except when I accidentally fall in love with them because I mistakenly believe they’re heterosexual, and then they rip my heart out of my chest, throw it on the ground, and jump up and down on it while laughing, which is pretty much what happened with Matthew. It helps if I can rationalize this incident by saying he’s probably gay. It is truly a haircut so bad only a gay guy could love it. Now, even if I wake up hearing voices talking about Matthew, I won’t care. He’s just another gay bald guy in the crowd with all the other gay bald guys. The Christian Church will be thrilled. He should go become a minister. This definitely makes it much, much easier for me to dislike him and forget about him, because I am obsessed with long haired men. My feelings towards short haired men are much more lukewarm. Thank you for supplying me with some handy-dandy mean and shallow reasons to reject you.

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2 Responses to “Matthew’s got a haircut”

  1. Anonymous Says:

    OMG GIRL!!!!!

  2. Anonymous Says:

    OMG GIRL!!!

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