Chronic fatigue; disgusting dreams; a leaking faucet; problems with dairy products; a nontoxic house; the layer of fat that won’t go away; why I’m not exactly like other atheists and don’t fit in with them; my complaints about Christians not doing anything in the real world; meditation on how Anaya can be both good, and also powerful

7:56 AM 5/31/2017

I had some disgusting dreams last night. In one of them, I felt a lump in my right breast. This felt very real. I’m awake now and it’s definitely not there, but in the dream it was as real as real life. If anything weird ever happens, it’s usually my left breast – that one seems to have more pain, and the pain is caused by bisphenol-A leaching out of my plastic dental fillings. It’s fibrocystitis. The only other time I had this breast pain was when I was a teenager and I had a plastic orthodontic retainer, which also would have been leaching plastic chemicals into my saliva. I never had that pain again until a few years ago when I replaced my mercury dental filling with a plastic one, and was duped into getting an unnecessary extra filling on a tooth where I didn’t have a cavity, so now I have two plastic fillings. I want to remove them sometime, but that project is on hold.

I’m wondering whether the use of plastic dental fillings is
contributing to the increase in hip damage in young people. I’m 42 but my hip joints are utterly destroyed. And I really, really don’t want to get a hip replacement, but there will be a time in the future when the hip joint is so completely destroyed that the leg bone cannot stay in the joint anymore, so that if I put any weight on it at all, it will slip out of joint and it will look like the horrible images that you can find on google image search. Only the ligaments are holding it in place at that point, not bones. I will need either a wheelchair, an exoskeleton, or bone regeneration technology, because I refuse to get a hip implant. I don’t know if I will ever change my mind about getting a hip implant – I may decide that my health just doesn’t matter anymore, so go ahead and let me be filled with toxic leaching chemicals causing severe systemic disease, implant syndrome.

Sometime this morning the maintenance men are coming over to fix the bathtub faucet – for some reason, it won’t shut off all the way, so it is constantly trickling.

The other dream: In this dream, I was drinking skim milk, and it caused a roll of fat to fall off from around my waist and my back. I’ve had this layer of extra fat that won’t go away for about a year now, and it’s unusual and I don’t know what’s causing it. I had several events that correlated with its sudden onset in the summer of 2016, mostly along the theme of exposures to some chemical, substance, or possibly microbe.

But in the dream, the fat did not burn away internally like it normally would when people lose weight. It FELL OFF. It was falling off my body, on the outside, like this rope wrapped around my waist. It was this red, bloody looking thing with the skin peeling off, and holes opening up into my abdomen, which would be allowing air and dirt and everything to go inside my body.

I did actually test skim milk in real life. I never drink skim milk anymore, but I bought it just this once. It is still organic skim milk. I know I have a correlation between drinking milk at all, and getting fat. I was going to just stop all dairy products completely, rather than switching to skim milk. There is an addiction to the opioid proteins in milk. Milk is addictive and is extremely hard to stop drinking. You have to also stop eating all sources of cheese. Pizza is pretty much the only thing to eat at work that is always available. Anyway, when I’ve stopped milk before, I’ve gone into actual withdrawal, which causes crying.

Well, I noticed rather quickly that this skim milk causes crying (‘lacrimation’ as a medical term) immediately, only a short time after I drink it. The crying is spontaneous, but it attaches itself to an ‘explanation’ that is convenient, and at this time, that explanation is Matthew. I know from experience that my emotions are almost never caused by an actual event, but rather by some kind of chemical, food, drug, hormone, etc. There are emotions associated with events, but they can always be reduced by controlling those other factors like drugs and food.

The whole milk didn’t instantly cause crying. It’s definitely the skim milk, and it causes it quickly.

It’s better to just completely quit all dairy products altogether. However, to do that, I would have to bring a satisfying meal with me to work, which would be quick and convenient and easy to wolf down, because we don’t get real breaks at work. We have to just eat during a time when it isn’t very busy. I don’t believe this is the way it *should* be, but that is the way it is. I don’t believe I should be working at a job like this at all, but that is a whole other topic.

So I am very likely to continue just eating the pizza at work just because there is nothing else to eat, and bringing my own meal is very hard to do. There are reasons why this is hard to do. My fatigue has been extremely severe in this apartment. I don’t know exactly what chemical it is or where it’s coming from, but it’s everywhere here in this place. I had the same problem while I was camping, if I slept in a hotel for a night or two – I always felt horribly poisoned by something there, the air, the pesticides, the carpets, I don’t know what.

Getting a house made out of completely nontoxic building materials – yes, that would be wonderful. I cannot trust anybody to build me a house that is completely nontoxic. They are always going to want to comply with some regulation that says the house has to be built some particular way, and therefore they have to put this toxic substance in here or over there – some kind of fire regulation or building codes or something.

What I need ideally is an underground house on an extremely isolated piece of land where I don’t even have to pay to own the land. Then I would go on to build an entire underground civilization and bring other people to live there, by invitation only. However, *that* plan is going to have to be put on hold until the day when everything in the universe has been magically fixed and I have the energy to get involved in gigantic multibillion dollar projects.

So for now, the best hope is buying my own piece of land without a house on it, camping there, and building my own unofficial house without telling anybody, so they don’t try to enforce building codes and force me to use toxic building materials or make the rooms a certain size or make the floor out of some substance besides mud. It’s not good enough for me to camp in the park like I was doing – too many police officers slashing holes in my tent because some retard calls and complains.

The only ‘building code’ I would want the house to comply with is the ability to withstand a tree falling on top of the house. Falling trees are one of the only things that I fear about living in the woods. I camped for such a long time, for so many years, that I heard dozens and dozens of trees falling in the woods, especially when it’s raining. I know that falling trees are a real danger. Falling trees, and lightning, are the only things I hate about camping. I’d like to have an underground basement of some sort, at least, to feel safer in the lightning and the tornadoes.

I never finished telling about this dream. The roll of fat was falling off my body, but was still around my waist, just peeling off and exposing this pink bloody flesh covered with lumps. I was shocked by this and was trying to figure out how to put it back in place, but I felt that it could never really be put back together because these holes and openings had exposed the inside of my body to the air, which is something that is never supposed to happen. You’re not supposed to get surgeries or get any part of your body cut open in such a way that all the deepest areas are touching the air, the dust, the bacteria, the particles, or the surgical tools that somebody seals up inside you and forgets to take out after surgery. Yeah, that happens. Surgeons don’t get enough sleep and are using too many drugs, which everyone in the medical community has easy access to.

What bothers me about the new layer of fat is that I suspect it could be holding onto toxic chemicals which will be released into my body if the fat goes away, and it could be the same chemical that gave Mom cancer, which I suspect was the chemical spill in January of whichever year, in West Virginia – was it 2015? Or 2014? I was there when it happened. Our water, supposedly, wasn’t affected, but I took a sip of the water and I felt like I was going to vomit and pass out. It definitely had *something* in it. I believe the poison went into the aquifer and spread everywhere throughout the entire area, not just into the water of that one particular company that supposedly was affected by it while everyone else allegedly wasn’t.

However, the fat suddenly appeared in summer of 2016, not at the time when I was at WV and drank the couple sips of water. That was actually the time when my big toe went numb for several weeks – after I was drinking diet soda as a substitute for drinking water! I never use artificial sweeteners or diet soda, but my parents had it in the house, and I started avoiding the tap water for the last day or two that I was visiting, so I drank diet soda for several days. My big toe went numb for several months after that. That was either the chemical spill poison, or the artificial sweetener. The feeling in the toe gradually came back over time.

Artificial sweetener is known for causing ‘multiple sclerosis’-like symptoms, including loss of sensation in the limbs. I only drank it for a *couple of days*.

Michael J Fox – said to be another ENFP, according to a lot of people in the typology community – and I had a crush on him when I was a child – he developed Parkinson’s, and some people have theorized it’s because he drank such a huge amount of either Diet Coke or Diet Pepsi, whichever one he used to be promoting, when he was in all the advertisements for it.

Drinking Coke with sugar and calories is actually *less bad* than drinking Diet Coke.

I’ve already written other blogs where I talked about my theories of what triggered the sudden onset of this new layer of fat that won’t go away.

But I can’t exercise in the conventional way for two reasons: chronic fatigue syndrome, and my totally destroyed hip joints. Swimming is the only exercise I tolerate. Riding my bike isn’t exercise – I specifically avoid exerting any effort at all, and I immediately get off the bike and start walking whenever I reach a hill. Chronic fatigue means I can’t recover normally after exercising, so that, the next day, I am still tired, for maybe a few more days. If I go swimming one day, I can’t go the next day.

However, swimming was great in terms of an actual aerobic,
cardiovascular workout. It’s gentle enough on my hip joints, although I had unexpected pain in a weird place – my ankle, from using my feet as flippers, or fins, or whatever. That foot movement apparently bothered an old injury. I’m guessing this injury might be from the skiing accident in college – that was actually a fun time. I hurt several things when I flipped over and rolled. I hurt a shoulder, a hip, and some other things, which were permanently injured and which will still hurt during weather changes, even today. I never went to the doctor for it, so I don’t know what kind of actual damage occurred.

I will try to swim today, if all goes well. I’m just waiting here until the maintenance men come to fix the bath faucet.


So now, I don’t have ‘closure’ per se with Matthew. He did ignore the last couple messages I sent, but it makes little difference, because he was mostly giving me the automated response of telling me that I should go to the church to get help from them.

I joined an atheists’ meetup group years ago, and *kind of* enjoyed it, but I do not really fit in the category of atheists either. Here are some of the reasons why.

I’m not really comfortable with Christianity. For some reason, I just don’t find much of anything useful in the bible at all. I can’t resonate with the ideas or descriptions of God, and now, after learning about, and directly experiencing, electronic mind control and radio frequency weapon attacks, I no longer trust any mental sensations of ‘resonating with the light of God’ or anything like that. I do receive help from friendly angels if I ever go to a church, but those friendly angels only stick around for a day or so. I really do enjoy talking to them, though. They’re nice. I don’t get a lot of nice imaginary friends talking to me.

I’m not entirely opposed to the idea of going to a church, and I’m not entirely opposed to the idea that a church is somewhat able to help me. However, churches do not emphasize or force people to have deep one-on-one interactions. A group of people is passively watching a source of information, and then they all go home. Nobody interacts with the other people in the room. They might as well all be at a movie theatre.

So yeah, I have a lot of problems with Christianity and churches, and I considered myself an atheist for a long time, but whenever I actually go and hang out with atheists at a meetup group or go to forums online, I realize that I’m not like them at all.

There are these people who believe in a religion they like to call ‘Science,’ with a capital S. Those people believe that it’s not possible to have any knowledge of anything in the universe at all unless this knowledge has been acquired by government employees wearing white lab coats doing a placebo-controlled double-blind experiment and publishing it in a peer-reviewed journal.

All of that is bullshit. Just wipe away that entire thing,
completely. Wipe it all off the page. It’s gone.

Knowledge is acquired by means of firsthand observation through the senses. We acquired all of our knowledge living in the woods in primitive tribes without any science, without any lab coats, without any placebo-controlled experiments. We tasted the plants to find out what symptoms they caused and whether they were poisonous. There is something called the ‘Universal Edibility Test,’ which I believe was taught by the military – I read it online somewhere. That is the original way that humans learned what to eat.

Then there are the realms of speculation. There are things that we don’t know about yet, or things which are difficult to understand, but they do exist and they do happen, or they possibly could happen, or people wonder about them. For instance, I wonder if it’s possible for some kind of living creature, with consciousness, to exist in a form of so-called ‘energy,’ without having a solid body made out of the usual types of materials that we usually think of as a body. This is a valid question and millions of people are wondering about this. We want to know about it because we want to know if we will live after we die.

But if you mention such an idea to a militant strict atheist, they would be appalled at the very thought of imagining such a thing. The horror! No, it is absolutely impossible for any form of energy to move around and possess consciousness without having solid objects like nerves to conduct electricity! No nerves, no consciousness! Absolutely not! That is unscientific woo-woo!

So, I don’t really get along with those people, because my mind is open enough to consider the possibility that yes, maybe I don’t entirely understand all the different forms and manifestations of energy that exist in the universe, and so maybe there is some possibility that ‘energy’ can exist without conducting itself through nerves in the way that we’re accustomed to in this type of body.

However, at the same time, I’m well aware of electronic weapon attacks and mind control. They are being done everywhere, to everyone, all the time. They can cause you to believe a lot of things that aren’t real, and experience a lot of things that aren’t real, including talking to ghosts and angels and entities and stuff. Could those experiences possibly be caused by electronic mind control? Yes. Even people’s near-death experiences could all be simulated by electronic mind control and virtual reality and forced hallucinations, and I know this because I’ve experienced all the things that these attackers have done to me personally. I know what they can do. I know from reading the accounts from other victims online that they can do a lot more types of things that they usually aren’t bothering to do to me, because for some reason, the attacks on me are pretty mild compared to some people.

But go to a group of atheists, and talk about my personal experiences of electronic mind control? That’s a ‘scientific’ phenomenon that involves technology; however, even *that* topic is not a safe one to talk about with them, because they believe that your own sensory experiences are totally nonexistent and untrustworthy. Only a group of scientists in lab coats doing a double-blind placebo-controlled government-sponsored experiment are capable of telling us what is real, and what isn’t. If I say that I experience voices in my head and I think it’s caused by somebody attacking me with a radio frequency weapon, even if I totally understand how these weapons work and have some information about the groups of people who are doing these attacks – nope! You can’t trust your own sensory observations, in the world of people who worship the gods of Science. Only an authority figure can tell you what to do in that situation, and the answer is: go get a prescription for psychiatric drugs.

Now, not *all* atheists are that bad of a pro-science troll, but a lot of them are.

Also, I agree with author Nathaniel Branden about something. He said in his self-esteem books that children tend to have better self-esteem if they grow up with at least *some* kind of discipline and authority in their life, rather than total chaos and a total lack of authority. There is such a thing as a reasonable, sensible amount of authority that will help give children boundaries and make them feel secure. He said that religion can sometimes help to provide these boundaries and this authority, by giving people some rules and limitations. The objectivists were all opposed to religion, and so Nathaniel Branden was going against them by saying this.

That is why I have envisioned Anaya. It is a set of rules, an ordnung like the Amish have. However, it’s different from other religions because it’s a set of rules about what kinds of foods to eat, how to give birth properly, how to avoid and prevent particular kinds of permanent physical damage that is normally inflicted by society (circumcision, tooth removals, gallbladder removals, etc), and other things. It is similar to several other religions in that it forbids the cutting and shaving of hair on both men and women, but there aren’t a lot of religions that do that, and I almost always have difficulty resonating with the religious texts that they read – for instance, I tried to read the Sikh texts and still don’t feel comfortable with them, even though I agree with them about hair.

So, I can’t really talk to atheists about my desire to build an intentional community, and an intentional religion, that will permanently improve the quality of life of every generation of people born in this religion. I do view it as a religion and not a mere ‘philosophy,’ because there is some meditation involved, and because it involves values, not just a search for ‘objective truth’ or something like that. There is a vision of what type of people are ideal, and an attempt to build a world where people can more easily be that way, not just the blaming of people for failing to live up to that. The world should support everything you do and help you to live up to the standards of the religion.

An annoying thing has happened twice now with me and churches. A couple years ago, I wasn’t living in this apartment, but rather on the other side of town, farther away from the UU church, which I still sort of want to go to, but haven’t yet. Well, I emailed the contact person on the website, the pastor minister or whatever, asking if there was anybody who was able to give people rides to church. I never got a reply at all.

I put up an ad on craigslist around that same time asking if anybody could give me rides on Sunday morning, and nobody ever answered the ad, even though I was offering to pay money. The only person who replied was some weird serial killer kind of person who seemed very suspicious and distrusting of me, asking me all sorts of weird questions, so I never did anything with that person. I just need a fucking ride! That’s all! There’s nothing suspicious about this! I’m not doing drug deals! I’m not trying to get hurt in an accident and sue you for a million dollars! I just want a fucking ride to church! This weirdo just didn’t get it. Nobody else answered the ad.

So, this time – I went to Matthew’s church, which was originally Hannah’s church, just once. I rode in a taxi to get there. Matthew, while he was here, was going to give me rides to the church, and that was fine with me. I was going to go with him. I do get frustrated whenever he keeps repeatedly telling me that all I need to do is go to a church, however, I am not completely against that idea either – I *slightly* agree with the idea that there could be *some* benefits from going to a church. So, I do actually want to go, but I also want to get a lot of encouragement from a physical person who will physically interact with me, encourage me, and get me out of bed, and give me a ride, and force me to have an obligation to wake up and do whatever I promised them I would do. There is nothing that can motivate me to do this except a real, physical, specific person, and I have to care a lot about that person, and it doesn’t seem to be female, it has to be a male, and it has to be a male that I care about a lot. I can’t just get encouragement from some female friend who wants to make me go to church.

Well, I wanted to go back to that church again, with a pair of earplugs this time because the music was too loud. Guess what I did? I replied to the email that somebody sent me from that church. I had given them my email address on that one day that I went there on my own, and somebody sent me a welcome letter which said something to the effect of ‘If you need anything, send me an email! I’m a nice person who wants to help you!’ And guess what? I sent this email asking if there was anybody who could help people get rides over to the church. And you know what I got? No fucking response whatsoever. That’s right! All talk and no action. We’re all about rejoicing in the grace of God and some dumb shit like that, but who gives a fuck about actually driving a fucking car and taking somebody over to the goddamn church, which is outside the edge of town.

The CCC, Christ Community Church, is very similar to Jesse’s church, the Assembly of God. They had almost exactly the same kind of music, and the same sequence of events – a bunch of loud music where you’re standing up when you first come in, and then a gradual transition to quieter, slower music, which contains hypnotic frequencies either in the music or radiating from something in the building. The hypnotic frequencies entrain your brain and put you partially to sleep. I can feel it working on me, but because I’m aware of it, and because I am not entirely compatible with Christianity or the belief in God, I perceive it as an alien enemy rather than something wonderful that I can resonate with, and so I feel it but I do not let it completely overcome me.

I had difficulty hypnotizing myself during the many times when I tried to do it in the past, and I totally failed to be hypnotized by a stage hypnotist who did a demonstration at our school when I was in college – I tried and tried and tried, but could not lose consciousness. I was in the crowd, not up there with him, but still, you can at least try to listen to him from far away. I couldn’t do it to myself, and I couldn’t do it when someone else did it to me. The only thing that can hypnotize me is a strong electronic weapon. And the hypnotic suggestions would have to be customized to my personality type, and my personal likes and dislikes, and my personal beliefs and knowledge and values.

Also, the type of hypnotic suggestions that I desire most are something along the lines of ‘Be strong. Be an individual. Know what you yourself value, and go after those values. Assert yourself. Don’t be afraid of what other people think.’ That’s not really what they suggest to you at church, although they *kind of* suggest parts of that – they want you to be strong, as long as you are supporting Christian beliefs while you are strong. If you have to go against society to support Christian beliefs, they want that.

Except, not really, because I really don’t see a lot of nonconforming, strong, fundamentalist, extreme Christians coming out of there and living their lives differently than everybody else in society. I also don’t see them talking about any challenging or controversial subjects at all. What they talked about last time was a bunch of vague waffle about how we didn’t want to be racists or be prejudiced against any particular groups, waffle waffle, nothing of substance really, but it sounded kind of nice. Nothing specific to go on, just nice
intentions. But they’ll never actually be bothered to take the trouble to give me a ride in the car to drive me towards those nice intentions. The nice intentions are just floating out there in space with no practical action towards them.

That was something I did appreciate about Matthew. He was physically helping me because he felt that his god would want people to give practical, material help to other people. He carried some bags out of the tent for me and drove them over to my apartment. And he insisted on carrying them himself even though they were heavy and I could have carried at least one. He also was suggesting other things I could do as a job, like being an uber driver, and I still remember that and I’m still taking it seriously, I just couldn’t do it right away and I have other things that I have to focus my extremely limited energy on doing. I haven’t forgotten it at all.

Like I said to him and like I have said here several times, I loved every minute that I was with him, even though it was a very limited number of minutes, over a short couple weeks. I can even tolerate learning about the bible, through him. I don’t like to read it myself, but if *he* is reading it, thinking about it, musing over it, and asking about it, then I will too, because we did that in the parking lot when we were going to go get the bags out of the tent. He was looking up some quotes about the parable of the seeds, which seeds are able to sprout and which ones can’t, if you throw them in the right place, or throw them onto a stony area without any soil, or throw them among the thorns.

I am very difficult soil. Not only do I have difficulty sprouting Christian beliefs and the word of God, I also did not remain pregnant for very long when I got pregnant in September of 2016. I felt it, and it lasted only a few days before it died, too soon to even show up on a pregnancy test. I seem to find strange nutrition in strange places. I find it myself. I was nourished by the Weston Price book – it completely changed my life and my perception of everything. I am nourished by David Wilcock and Corey Goode’s work – they are extremely different from others, although I don’t agree with every single thing they do 100% or every single thing they believe. I have a few limits, but overall, I’m very well nourished by them. I have great difficulty finding any nourishment in the Christian bible. I have this feeling that I’ve already heard it all before and have already found that it was either useless, or that the people who believed in it weren’t doing anything of practical value in the world other than claiming that they believed in the bible.

I have a lot more respect for people like the Amish. They are actually living an extremely different lifestyle because of their beliefs, and they endure hardships and inconvenience to do so. They maintain strict boundaries and only adopt technology very gradually, many decades after it appears, and only after asking whether it really benefits their community. I’m not saying the Amish are perfect – I disagree with a lot of things they do, too. For instance they do use pesticides, whereas I believe a religion should completely forbid all pesticides – they are so harmful to people and to the whole world.

There are a few little things like that, but I’m saying, overall, the Amish are living a very different lifestyle because of their beliefs, and I respect them for that. I can’t see anything like that when I look at mainstream Christians who go to mainstream Christian churches and talk about vague ideas that have no application to their daily lives, other than maybe ‘Don’t give up when things get difficult – God is helping you.’ That same message over and over again is all I can hear.

Anyway I was originally talking about how I’m not really a strict atheist either, and I don’t necessarily ‘fit in’ when I go to a group of official atheists or forums about atheism online. I have beliefs and values that go against a lot of things the atheists believe and value, even if I also don’t entirely fit in with Christianity or any other existing pagan beliefs or any New Age spiritual beliefs. I don’t really fit into anything.

The only existing belief systems that I *kind of* fit into are things like Gnosticism, although I actually know almost nothing about it. The only thing I know about Gnosticism is, it says something like ‘There might actually be real gods out there, powerful beings who can do some of the things that people claim they can do, but those powerful beings are not necessarily our friends, and worshipping them is not necessarily the best thing to do.’ I totally, totally agree 100% with that! That is how I see the world. All sorts of things are possible. People have supernatural experiences and paranormal experiences and technological experiences. I don’t know every detail about everything that goes on in the universe, and there’s a lot out there that could be going on without my knowledge of it, and so many things are possible.

But even so, I instinctively resist ‘worshipping’ or submitting to the will of a powerful being. I’m able to submit to government laws when I know that the entire society will turn against me and kill me, force me to pay fines, or put me in prison for breaking some law, but I’m not happy about it, and I don’t enshrine this behavior into a religion saying that it’s a good thing to do. Government is a ‘necessary evil,’ some people say – I don’t really phrase it that way. But it is an evil. I am not going to make a religion that says that submitting to the will of government, joyfully, and thankfully, while giving praises as loudly as possible, and incorporating government’s will into our lives, is a good and wonderful thing to do. I am not going to write and sing songs about the joys of government and the greatness of government.

So I am perfectly capable of submitting to powerful, threatening groups when it’s necessary to do so, and powerful, threatening individuals who are willing and able to kill me whenever they want to, or torture me, or imprison me, or destroy my entire life, or whatever they want to do. Yes, there are other forces out there that have power over me. But I don’t have to be happy about it.

That is one reason why I frequently meditate about my concept of Anaya. Anaya is not a ‘deity,’ but rather, a vision of an ideal group of humans, and I define them with my socionic type: the ENFP and ISTP types, the most compatible types with my own personality (and I sometimes also talk about the ESTJ and INFJ in the Delta Quadra, or other types outside the quadra and my relations with them). But Anaya is designed deliberately to be compatible with my own personality type.

And the question or thought that I frequently meditate on, over and over, because it is a very big unsolved problem for me, a huge issue for me that never goes away, is the question, How can somebody be both good, and powerful?

I cannot imagine a powerful god who is also good. I am accustomed to a world in which powerful people are never good, and good people are never powerful. Never, never have I seen someone who is
simultaneously good, and powerful. If someone had a lot of power, then what could they do in the world, in the real world, the physical world, that was also very good? What do I define as a very good thing to do if you have a lot of wealth and power? What kind of power do they have and how is it manifested? What uses of power are okay? I meditate about these things to build my vision of Anaya – Anaya isn’t a deity, but a group of people who, for me, are composed of the ISTPs and ENFPs, who manifest very healthy traits that are capable of developing in those two types, so that my expectations are realistic. You can’t expect an ISTP to become a master of controlling and expressing emotions, for instance – that doesn’t work with their personality type. You *can* expect them to do things that their type is able to do. Anaya only expects its people to do things that they are capable of doing, and doesn’t demand that they do things, or become things, or are required to be things that they cannot, and Anaya does not blame them and judge them for failing to do those things.

Anaya is different from the Christian god because Anaya is mortal and finite, with limited power, and not omniscient or omnipotent. Anaya does not create the world, and Anaya does not write the script of every event that happens. Anaya does not use electronic weapons to control the brains of every person on the planet. Anaya avoids and escapes from electronic mind control because they value free will above almost everything else in the universe. Free will is the ultimate sacred value held over everything. Free will.

I’m going to post this… it’s too long. I should go read something. I’m still waiting for these danged maintenance people to come over and fix my leaking faucet.


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