Someone has kind of answered me a couple times. I’m almost getting my hopes up. This is like a dating website.

It really does feel like using a dating website, except I’m in the position that a male is usually in. Males are the ones who initiate on dating websites, not because they have to, but because they simply start bombarding us so quickly that we have no choice but to confront this giant flood of guys who are messaging us the instant we get on, so we don’t have a chance to even start looking at men’s profiles and choosing which ones we might want to message first. Then we have to sift through all the crap that has been sent to us, and ignore the vast majority of it.

Except now, I am in the position of spamming some reluctant person who has something I need, rather than being in the position of providing something that thousands and thousands of desperate men need (there is an enormous ratio of men to women on dating websites).

I got a reply from this person a couple times… she responded to my texts and was answering me… I was in the process of making an appointment to go visit the place…. but, now, I’m waiting a couple minutes to hear back from her… is she going to suddenly stop answering? Is it falling through at the last minute now that I’m making it real by threatening to try to visit the place in reality? I could just go over there and knock on the door on the day and time that I said I would like to. She said she’s flexible. She was sort of responding almost like a human being might do, kind of. Up until this moment when I tried to schedule a visit.

EVERY FUCKING AD THAT I HAVE ANSWERED HAS EITHER IGNORED ME OR TALKED TO ME A COUPLE TIMES AND THEN HAD SOME KIND OF PROBLEM OR STOPPED ANSWERING. I also called the one person recommended by my coworker, but his apartments started at $700, which is above my range. I’m trying to find things below $500.

@#(*&$^ *^#*(@&^ GRgrgerger ger gr!!!

Is this person a yes, or a no????

I can’t wait to use my sewing machine again. I need a place to plug it in. I bought it while living at the Youngs’ house. But then they told me I had to leave. I couldn’t use it downstairs in the family room because I was in the way, but I couldn’t use it in my bedroom because it was so tiny and cramped and full of their junk. So I had this serger and I just barely got to use it a couple times, to just start practicing. If it has gotten wet and rusty while being stored in my tent, so be it, for the love of God I WILL BUY A FUCKING NEW ONE AGAIN if I have to. I WILL USE A SEWING MACHINE TO SEW MY OWN FUCKING CLOTHING BEFORE THE END OF MY FUCKING LIFETIME, SO HELP ME GOD. And that requires me to have a place to plug it in, unless I buy a non-electric one with a pedal pusher thing, an old-fashioned one, and set it up in a tent in the woods. So help me God. I will sew my own clothing.

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