four introverted perceivers, camaraderie or comfortable conversation

9:30 AM 12/5/2016

We had great chemistry. This was a socionics experiment. Many people in the forums have observed that perceivers and judgers, as a very general rule, feel most comfortable among their own kind – perceivers with other perceivers, judgers with other judgers. This is more general than the socionics intertype relations, which describe the relations between each type individually.

Four of us stayed late to close at Maki Yaki. If only we’d had Rich with us, it would have been perfect! I want to see that happen sometime, the four of us and Rich. We were: me (ISTP), Kat (INTP), Paul (INFP), and Joseph (ISTP). Rich is ISFP. If Rich had been there we would’ve had the introverted perceivers from every quadra.

We had this comfortable chemistry, this camaraderie, when it was just us. Everyone felt more free to talk openly and be themselves. Joseph became amazingly strong – I have never seen him talk so much and so freely, although he probably has done it before but I wasn’t able to hear or see the whole conversation.

Socionics and the Myers-Briggs types (albeit with all of their flaws in their system) help me to understand what creates that camaraderie. That feeling was mentioned in the ‘Seven Habits of Highly Effective People’ book, if I recall, the feeling that a group of people is creating a feeling of togetherness and cooperation, but I can’t recall the word he used for it.

I think it mattered that we were all introverts. If there had been extraverts there, they would have tended to dominate the conversation. It was an interesting chemistry, just the introverts. To find our duals, we need the extraverts. But for this particular feeling, this special kind of camaraderie we all had, this special kind of comfort, this mix of people worked out great.

I don’t mean to alienate the judging personality types, especially the ones in my own quadra – my own mother is an ESTJ and I absolutely love her, and my friend Steve is an INFJ – I would spend more time with him except that he’s an extremely heavy chain smoker who has to have a small bit of a cigarette every, like, half hour or so.

It’s more about conflicts in the workplace. I want to do an experiment with two workplaces, where all the judgers go to one workplace, and all the perceivers go to the other. Both places will do perfectly fine, in terms of doing business, but the comfort level will be much, much greater for everyone. Judgers are frustrated by perceivers, and perceivers are frustrated by judgers, at work. Without going into detail on each and every socionic relation, it’s easier to just make the first division between judgers and perceivers as the most important, most helpful, most major division that helps prevent conflict in the workplace.

I think that J/P is the most important dichotomy. You can actually see it right there in the brain, in Dario Nardi’s work, except that HE DOES THE J/P SWITCH FOR INTROVERTS and so every single introvert is the opposite of what it should be – improperly labeled. This is the huge monkeywrench thrown in the system that I believe is a piece of disinformation and not an accident – it was created deliberately to fuck everything up. The J/P switch for introverts is this weird thing that people started believing, which was a mistake – they believe that if you are using Fi as your strongest function, for instance (a judging function), then you are actually a perceiver, and if you use Si as your strongest function (a perceiving function), then you are actually a judger, and so on. So you might get labeled an ISFP when you’re actually an ISFJ, and get labeled an INTJ when you’re really an INTP, and IT FUCKS UP THE ENTIRE SYSTEM COMPLETELY.

But if you know what to look for, if you know he’s labeled every introvert wrong on the J/P dichotomy, then you can look directly in the brain on his EEG diagrams and see which side of the front lobe is more active. Fp1 is judging (left side front), and Fp2 is perceiving (right side front). You can’t see any other functions or dichotomies in such a straightforward, obvious way. This is just one small specific area of the brain that DIRECTLY CORRESPONDS to this dichotomy, but Dario Nardi messed it all up by doing the J/P switch for introverts.

I don’t feel like ranting about the J/P switch. Suffice it to say, it is a huge, enormous mistake and a huge piece of disinformation, a mistaken belief, a brain-virus, screwing up the entire system and spreading everywhere through the forums and the internet. All I can say is IT IS COMPLETELY WRONG, IGNORE IT, DON’T EVER DO IT, DON’T LEARN IT, DON’T TRY TO UNDERSTAND IT, IT… IS…. WRONG.

So anyway. I want to do this experiment – put all the perceivers together from all four quadras. That would be at minimum a group of eight people. You could have both sexes and it would be sixteen people. But this very small, very interesting group we had last night was all the introverts. We could have taken on a couple more ‘copies’ of the same types, such as another male or female of the same type, and the conversation still would have had this camaraderie. If there are too many people, then some people won’t get enough time talking, and others will become strong and tend to dominate.

The perceiver/judger dichotomy really strongly affects the *flow* of the conversation. Judgers make decisions and think or feel more openly and more constantly about everything – the conversation has a sort of jerky, harsh, too-fast flow for me. I like the laid back flow of the perceivers all together. Again I don’t want to alienate the people I love – I spent years and years having long conversations with Valencia in college – INFJ, my activator – and I can also have really good long conversations with my mom, ESTJ (mirror relation), who seems to understand things that no one else on earth understands. And my friend Steve makes me feel extremely comfortable no matter where we are and no matter what we are doing.

I do not want to merely do away with judgers or wipe them off the face of the earth. It’s just that I want to do this experiment to minimize conflict in the workplace, and see how it turns out. I have noticed that I truly love the flow of the conversations and the interactions when it’s a large group of perceivers all together. Everything is so comfortable, so cheerful, so natural and relaxed.

We mentioned one thing that bothered me last night. I had started to notice that it seemed like this one guy, James, one of the two black people working there (Charles is the other black guy, from Africa, with an accent, who might *possibly* *possibly* be another ISFP, I’m not sure), hadn’t been here for a few days and I was wondering what happened. Well, he quit. Here are all the things I liked about James – he was a dancer, and was participating in dance competitions, along with another guy, David (Korean, ESFP). James was some kind of SP, but I wasn’t sure if he was another ISTP or an ESFP or what – I couldn’t tell for sure. I only know I liked him. He was studying Japanese in college but he said he wasn’t doing very well in the class.

He had been getting a lot of food when he was working – apparently, a ridiculously huge amount of food. He had worked there longer than Kat, and Kat explained that he had always done that since she had known him. A new guy, Dave (ENTJ), the new cook and sort of like a manager (my socionic supervisee), complained about James taking so much food, and apparently confronted him about it, and that was part of why he quit.

This is a difference between judgers and perceivers. The perceivers all saw him doing it, taking tons of food. I didn’t – I only noticed that he definitely would sit down and eat a meal, but I believe we are entitled to do that. Joseph said he understood what Dave was getting at, from a business and profit point of view, and Kat tried to defend James and what he was doing – but, even so, while we discussed these things and expressed our opinions about them, none of the perceivers had ever felt that it was enough of an emergency that immediate action needed to be taken to directly confront him and make him stop doing it. Everyone who had seen it had been shocked by the large amount of food he was taking. Kat explained that he was paying for college and working at several jobs and he had hardly any money for food. But the point is, being perceivers, none of us felt that it was so urgent and so important that we absolutely had to confront him about it right now. But Dave did, the ENTJ. Myro and Mike (ESTJ and ISFJ) never confronted him about it either, and they’re both J types, so this does not directly divide perceivers and judgers, and they’re the owners of the business – so, again, this may seem unclear because two judging types themselves did not choose to take direct action about it either. It was only Dave who made this happen, and James left partly as a result of that confrontation.

It’s just that the strongest correlation, and the least specific and most general, is that in the workplace, I see conflicts between perceivers and judgers as the worst ones. There were some pretty annoying incidents between me and a drug-addicted ESTP
(extinguishment/contrary relation, depending on what web page you read – they call them different names) at McDonald’s one time (but he only worked there a couple weeks and then either quit or got fired), but I know from experience that anybody who is addicted to any kind of drugs is much more annoying and abrasive than anyone who is drug-free. He was openly doing drug deals in the workplace. One of his drug-dealing buddies actually came behind the counter and he wasn’t even an employee, he just came behind the counter to talk to this guy and give him something or ask him to give him a call or something.

I can’t really type anymore because Jacob is lying on my chest and I’m in bed. I’ll write later.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: