The badly designed web page conspiracy – who profits?

I read an article yesterday about people who make more than $100,000 a year. One of them was a ‘user experience researcher,’ someone who researches how people experience using web pages for large
corporations. These are the people who are to blame for the fact that the internet no longer uses frames on their web pages, even in situations where a frame would be the best solution and would be much better than a box that disappears and reloads every time you click a link on it. These are the people responsible for making the internet slower, clunkier, and less efficient than it could be.

Why would this sinister group of people get paid such a huge amount of money to conspire to ruin the internet user’s experience? Who profits if the internet is slow, clunky, badly designed, frustrating, and uses huge amounts of data….. when a plain HTML website would suffice….. Data?

Well, there are phone companies. If somebody gets charged for their data use if they surf the net from their phone, then phone companies get more money if the people are wasting huge amounts of data on badly designed web pages. Yes, even mobile web pages can be designed to waste more or less data. They could conspire to make the web pages as slow and clunky as possible, while still being barely usable for the user, so that the largest possible amount of data gets wasted and phone users have to pay more money for using the internet.

How else would somebody profit from making the web as horribly unusable as possible, so much so that they would pay people more than $100,000 to do nothing but research ‘user experience,’ which is horrible, and set norms and standards for making the entire web more horrible and unusable? Not everyone is dumb enough to use the internet from their phone (instead of hooking up to a wifi, which is what I do when I use my phone) and get charged for data usage.

I can’t think who profits from this, but I can only say that it is something sinister and evil. The military gets to use the plain, simple, old-fashioned, fast-loading computer programs, which are often installed on older models of old-fashioned computers which are kept and maintained for a very long time. Their interface is extremely simple and efficient. For them, it is a matter of life and death that their computer programs are extremely simple and easy to use, and they cannot do anything insane like the garbage we are forced to experience on the normal internet.

If everybody everywhere is slowed down and bogged down by huge, slow, clunky web pages which are designed by these highly paid ‘user experience researchers,’ I can only say that it wastes the hours of everyone’s lives and distracts them, preventing them from finding what they are looking for on the internet, so that nobody anywhere can really use the internet to accomplish anything or to make their life easier. The internet has been designed to waste as much of your time as possible and distract you as much as possible, to prevent you from finding the information you really need.

We really don’t want people to find information instantly and easily. It’s like ‘the great firewall of China,’ except it isn’t a firewall, it’s an entire internet of slow loading, horribly malfunctioning web pages designed by experts who deliberately make them as bad as possible.

Also, if these are very large, expensive web pages, then they are going to be things like MEDICAL web pages. These ‘user experience researchers’ who get paid over $100,000 a year are being paid to find ways to bury and hide and conceal and disguise the trolls who are posing as ‘objective scientists’ on the medical web pages when actually they are shills for the drug companies, making web pages talking about how wonderful a drug is whenever you are desperately searching for important pieces of information on a website about medicine.

‘User experience researchers’ must be tied in together with these trolls who are shills for the drug companies. Whoever these companies are designing web pages with the help of these ‘researchers,’ they are extremely profitable companies that are able to afford to pay someone such a huge salary to do something so insane. I can sum up the internet users’ experience in two words: it sucks. I can tell you a hundred thousand things that are horribly wrong with your web pages, and I don’t get paid $100,000 a year.

I don’t know exactly how the conspiracy works. I can only tell you the result of it. The result of these ‘user experience researchers,’ who are all going to collude together and set the norms for what they think is a ‘normal user experience’ on the internet – oh, you can’t POSSIBLY just use plain, simple HTML for a web page! People don’t expect that! It doesn’t look professional! They expect to have slow-moving, clunky buttons that they have to push, with smoothly edged pixels around the sides of the buttons that shade from one color to another and look three-dimensional! Every web page must use a minimum of 1,000 MB of data! The web shouldn’t function too quickly, because that would surprise people! People would be shocked to see that their web pages are capable of loading at lightning speed in a fraction of a second if only they aren’t filled to the brim with useless garbage that nobody wants!

The result of this is pain and discomfort, slowness and frustration, while using the internet. And who benefits from my user experience being slow and frustrating? Anybody who has anything to hide. If I want to quickly uncover data that I am desperately seeking, sadly it’s buried so deep in this website that I will never find it, because the designers wanted it to be hidden. They can cover their asses and tell me they aren’t censoring anything, but in reality the result is that they censor whatever they want to censor by designing web pages that are so slow and nonfunctional that you get frustrated and give up whenever you are struggling to find the information that is truly important.

Aside from the other theory, which is that phone companies get rich if people use their phones to surf the web and download the maximum possible amount of data – and that conspiracy makes sense too. But is that theory profitable enough to pay someone millions of dollars to ‘research the user experience?’ I don’t know.

All I know is, that job is something that I could do very, very well, except for the fact that I KNOW the job title is hiding something sinister and evil, and it is not what it appears to be. These people do not exist for the purpose of making the internet a better place. They exist to make it a WORSE place, because that is the result that they achieve, and they also exist to ‘set norms,’ so that everybody is conforming to a fashion or a trend of web pages, so that all web pages everywhere do the same, stupid shit, like getting rid of frames and forcing everything to reload every time you push a button, rather than using an old-fashioned frame that stays there after you push the button and doesn’t disappear. These people exist for the purpose of ignoring the discomfort and dissatisfaction and frustration of the internet user, and their job is to rationalize to everyone and make it appear that they are ‘doing the best they can’ to ‘improve the user experience.’ But why? Who profits from such a massive failure to make a tolerable, sane user experience? Who profits enough that they’re willing to pay someone $100,000 a year to do this job?

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