No, seriously, the bead stones are VERY helpful

I used the beads again today.  I just pressed them against my skin in various places, then meditated with them there.  I meditated on things I need to think about, and plans and decisions I need to make, and preparations for the near future.  I put a bunch of the beads on my face over my eyes, and I put a couple strings of the beads onto my abdomen, over my liver and intestines, because when I’m thinking about anything that causes anxiety, I can feel my gallbladder trying to clench but being unable to – I’m still sure it has gallstones – and I can feel my intestines trying to clench too, when I get anxious.  This is why I literally have no gall.  I don’t have the gall to do anything that takes courage, because my physical gallbladder won’t squeeze out any gall when I’m scared.

I have observed in all these years of being attacked by electronic weapons, since 2003 when I became aware of it, that the attackers never stop attacking me voluntarily just to be nice.  If they stop attacking me, it’s because they *can’t*.  The only time the attacks ever change or stop (temporarily) is if I travel someplace very far out of my usual circles, go to a very strange location that I would never go to, keep moving around to unpredictable places, or go to someplace that has some kind of rudimentary shielding.

I’ve never been anyplace that had super hardcore shielding that was deliberately made to block electronic attacks, but I think I’ve noticed some comfort from going inside stone buildings, like a stone church.  It wasn’t a shugilite church, it was just stone.

I noticed changes in the phenomena when I was lying on the earth weeks and weeks ago, before this cold spell.  It really must be true that lying directly on the ground helps to dissipate electromagnetic energy.  It did not stop the attacks, but the sensation of being disturbed and disrupted and interrupted by them was reduced, as in, they had less effect, and also the constant background radiation had less effect too.  Even if I’m not being attacked, I believe that the background noise from all the cell phones, weather radar, and everything else is interfering with my brain and body.

Well, it is similar with the beads.  These are short little strings of semiprecious stone beads, nothing in particular, although I did go buy tourmaline because I read that it generates electrons (I didn’t feel anything different from what I felt with the other stones, though!).  I only know that I have loved, absolutely loved and desired, semiprecious stones, beads, and crystals my whole life.  I felt that they should be magical, they must be magical, although I wasn’t able to do anything like shoot beams of light out of them or do telekinesis with them.  And I haven’t had any stones or beads of any kind for years and years, because I’ve been getting rid of my contaminated belongings, so I didn’t buy anything nice.

The beads are not expensive, just a couple bucks for a little string of stones.  Even in the worst case, if they got so badly contaminated that I had to get rid of them, it would only be a couple bucks lost.  It isn’t like these are rubies and sapphires.  Although, I would be very curious to find out if precious gems had any unusual effects or sensations when I touched them.

It actually amazes me that I have found something that almost, kind of, works!  I’m not saying that this is the one big thing that’s going to turn my life around once and for all, but rather, it makes a small difference that helps.  That’s all.  This tiny little difference makes me hopeful.  It makes me think, maybe all I need is a shield of stone and crystal.  Maybe it doesn’t have to be all that expensive.  Maybe that would help enough, just enough, that I could think more clearly and make decisions.

I dreaded the thought of trying to make a ‘real’ shield out of toxic copper and other metals and expensive shielding materials that I would have to buy online.  What if I could just use stones and crystals instead – it would feel more magical, more wonderful, more beautiful, more earthy, and more in line with my vision of how I want the world to be.  Stones are primitive.  Stones don’t violate my rules about how much manufacturing and industry and chemistry that I want to see going on in the world.  It doesn’t take a smoke-spewing factory to produce some stones that were dug out of the ground.  Mining is dangerous and deadly, but it could be done carefully.  Stones don’t require quite as much of a global economic system – some kind of stone is available anywhere, albeit maybe not fancy crystals or beautiful semiprecious gemstones.

I was lying there thinking, with the beads over my eyes, and some of them on my abdomen, and some held between my two hands.  I also stroked them over both hands in the beginning, before putting them on my eyes.  I was able to focus *just enough* that I could finish thinking a few coherent thoughts about the future.  I have to get a job, and I probably have to move out of this house soon, although I don’t know when exactly.  It’s uncertain at this point.  But I was able to think a coherent, uninterrupted thought for a few fractions of a second longer, just long enough to make the thoughts more useful, more practical, of greater value, more convincing, more understandable, more integrated into my vision of the future.  The thoughts were *actable*, just like the thoughts I was thinking while lying on the cool green mossy earth weeks ago.

During that session where I was lying on the moss, I was able to decide to go for a bookkeeping job.  I think that might have also been when I decided I would like to go to a career counselor.  While earthing, I was able to focus just enough to muster the will, to create a vision of the future, a simple, practical, actable vision (oops, I need to figure out which one of these stones I’m allergic to – something gave me a rash on my eyelid which is itching now – it probably has nickel in the stone).

But it’s not easy for me to do that kind of earthing all the time, because it is extremely cold, all the time, even in the summer.  The soil is always 55 degrees underground in the caves, and the soil above ground is not much warmer than that, and it drains away all my body heat, giving me hypothermia.  It’s also very wet, and it’s been raining for weeks, and also, I am in a location where the neighbors can see me lying on the ground, no matter where I go around the house, although I suppose I could kind of avoid being seen, at least partly.

So I can use beads from the comfort of my bed, under my blankets, with the heating pad turned on, without getting rained on or seen by the neighbors.

If I had to make a ‘scientific’ (ugh, I try to avoid using the word ‘science’ as much as possible – the word tastes bad in my mouth) explanation of what the stones are doing, I would have to say that they really do conduct or distribute electromagnetic energy and radio waves somewhat.  They somehow interact with the field of radio waves and background noise around me.  It is a material property.  You’d be able to find out about this if, say, you were reading about the people who use radio waves to look for petroleum deposits underground.  They would know that different kinds of stones and soil respond differently to the radio waves.

I know this is going to sound trivial, but if you think it’s trivial, that means you don’t understand just HOW HARD it is for me to think even the simplest, most basic, most banal of thoughts without being disturbed by attacks or background noise (I have earplugs in to reduce auditory noise too, but I’m referring to radiation, not just audio).

While meditating with the beads over my face today, I was able to clearly imagine that what I need for the upcoming move is a wagon or wheelbarrow of some sort, to make it easy to carry all the heavy bags long distances.  It was so hard to carry things down that path into the woods.  I had help from Jason to carry them out last time.

I don’t really want just a dolly, because it has small wheels, and no sides.  The small wheels would drag on the rocks of the dirt path, and the rocks would go between the wheel and the metal part, catching in there so the wheel wouldn’t turn.  The dolly has no sides, so the stuff has to be strapped on somehow, or just held on by the person pulling it.  A wagon has sides and is horizontal, so bags won’t fall out, and its wheels are taller and less likely to catch rocks.

As trivial as this sounds, I was able to clearly imagine this simple thing, this simple, basic, ordinary thing that everyone else on earth takes for granted – of *course* you should be able to think about how you are going to move your belongings from one place to another when you have to relocate.  Everyone else can do that, but I can’t, because my brain is always either being attacked, or getting interference from background radio.

But when I was lying in bed with strings of stone beads draped over my eyes and my face, I was able to focus just enough to grasp this simple thought about how helpful it would be if only I had a wagon with wheels large enough to go over some gravel on a dirt pathway.  You really can’t imagine how hard it is for me to think, the rest of the time.  I am functioning at the absolute minimum level needed to survive, to simply prevent death.  My brain sends the signals for my heart to keep beating and my intestines to digest the food and my lungs to keep breathing – or maybe my spinal cord does that.  I’m able to keep on breathing and circulating blood, and I can make my limbs move and keep my balance well enough to walk, but that’s seriously all that I can do.  I cannot think even the simplest thoughts that rise above the minimum needed to perform basic bodily functions.

I am telling you, that when I had just a few stone beads lying on my body and my face in various places, I was able to focus enough to form a few simple, clear thoughts about the future, thoughts that were practical and actable.  I can’t even do that with EFT tapping.  I get zapped VERY badly while doing EFT tapping.  Whatever progress I make with the tapping is instantly destroyed a second later when my body gets hit with an electric cattle prod.

I bought a string of tourmaline chips which are kind of sharp and pointy and irregular, and I don’t like those as much because I can’t roll them over the skin.  I have to just leave that string lying in one place because it’s sharp.  So it’s better for me to have smooth stones.  I’m not rolling the beads over my skin most of the time, though.  I mostly just let them sit there while I’m thinking.

Again, it seems trivial, but you have no idea how much of a difference it would make for my life if I could only have just one single coherent thought per day.  Just one coherent thought that was clear, solid, and actable.  I normally go months and months without having a single coherent thought.  I know it seems like I’m thinking when I write blogs, but that’s just a load of crap that comes out automatically, like a bodily function.  It’s a waste product.  It’s not useful.  I’m talking about real thoughts that actually make a difference and improve my life.

It’s those small things, like buying a wagon so I can more easily carry my belongings when I move, or deciding that I need to have a cardboard box to put all my mail and papers in so that they won’t be lying in a big pile on the floor.  Those simple, pathetic little thoughts are the thing that has been taken away from me, leaving me disabled and unable to make even the tiniest improvements in my quality of life, for decades upon decades.

Those are the type of thoughts that I need the most.  They add up over time, making permanent improvements in my infrastructure, so that from then on, everything in my life is just a tiny bit easier.  I can find something more easily, or reach something more easily, or I have a little more space in all the piles of junk, or I can move more easily around some obstacle, or my workflow is a tiny bit smoother.  After I’ve fixed those little things, I have more energy for other things, just a tiny crumb of energy here and there, but those tiny crumbs add up.  They reduce my overall stress.  I’m telling you, those are the type of thoughts that I’m able to think about when I have stone beads lying on my skin.

I’ll go ahead and upload the photos.  I need to do some stuff today.  I have to get on the bus and go to town.

It’s strange though, I wasn’t comfortable keeping the beads on permanently.  I wanted a rest from them last time.  I also think they might possibly put a substance onto my skin which is being absorbed transdermally, some kind of minerals, since they are stones after all and stones are made of minerals.  I’m probably getting some kind of ions.  There are all sorts of ions they could be giving me through the skin.  I just should try to avoid nickel, although the rash seems to have been temporary.  It’s still a slightly itchy feeling.  I don’t know how these stones were processed, either, and I would want to find a supplier who used no chemicals at all.  There are no mandatory labeling laws for the ingredients of physical objects that you aren’t swallowing, because hardly anybody is aware of the phenomenon of transdermal absorption of substances.

Okay, photos.  Anyway, I was saying, I probably don’t want to just go around wearing stone necklaces all the time.  I felt a little weird after touching the stones for a long time.

 

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s


%d bloggers like this: