Free sashimi at work

2:06 PM 12/6/2014

I’m getting the bus figured out. As silly as this sounds, I’m really happy that I might be going past Wegman’s frequently. It won’t be every night, depending on which bus I take, which depends on what time I get out of work. But I’ll be going there frequently, and once I start getting paychecks again I will be able to buy food there. However, I won’t have much money for food if I’m only working one job. I’ll have to do the ‘beans and rice’ kind of grocery buying, instead of the ‘organic grassfed ground beef for $10’ and ‘all natural smoked sockeye salmon, wild caught for $10’ and that kind of thing.

A nice thing about this job is I can get free raw tuna sashimi. They make hors d’oeuvres (is the e first, or the u? I had to google it yesterday) with sashimi. I didn’t know what it was. I thought it was a little slice of raw beef with pepper on the outside. They told me it’s tuna. It has the same red color. I ate a couple pieces that customers didn’t eat, when the dishes came back to be washed. I ate the pieces if it looked like they were in good condition and hadn’t been bitten off of. Some of them were untouched. Then, later on, they decided to get rid of the last little bit of it because it had been sitting out for a while and it was the end of the day, so I timidly ate some of that too. I did not experience any parasite sensations AT ALL last night while sleeping, so I am very likely to continue eating more raw tuna today and every time I work.

I asked Mom if she could send me a check. She said yes, then lectured me about how I need to get Medicaid. She worries that something is going to happen, I’m going to have to go to the hospital, and they won’t take me because I don’t have any way of paying. However, the medical industry parasitically overcharges insurance companies for unnecessary treatments and charges things like $10,000 to sleep in a hospital bed for a single night, and things like that, and if you have insurance, then they will continue to give you unnecessary and harmful treatments over and over again for as long as possible, making you sicker and sicker until you finally die, but they try as hard as they can to keep you barely alive for as many years as possible so they can keep on sucking the life out of you and making money. That is how mainstream medicine works.

There are only a small number of situations where mainstream medicine is able to do anything at all, and even in those situations you might still be better off taking your chances on your own. If you have a gross injury, such as a broken bone sticking out through the skin and bleeding, from a car accident, and other obvious trauma, then they’re able to do surgeries and things to put it back together – and even then, you can die from the drugs used in the surgery, or they can do things you didn’t want them to do – ‘Hey! While we’ve got this person sedated, let’s chop off a couple of their limbs and organs!’ or ‘Hey, while we’ve got this lady drugged into a coma and lying here in a hospital bed, let’s chop off all her knee-length hair because it’s inconvenient for us to wash it and comb it!’

That last one was a true story told by my former coworker at weis. She had myasthenia gravis, and I don’t have any idea what that is, and I’ll have to google it, but that’s what she had, and she was drugged and asleep in the hospital, and the nurses took it upon themselves to chop off her extremely long hair, and I think it was knee length, because it was merely inconvenient for them to comb it and wash it. Oh no! The patient will *DIE* if we don’t wash and comb her hair every single day! To me, that screams ‘MILLION DOLLAR LAWSUIT,’ because hair takes decades to grow long, and it is an extremely valuable asset.

You can go on television and get paid thousands and thousands of dollars to do an extreme makeover and have your extremely long hair cut off and then professionally styled on TV, but this can only be done once, and also, the chopping of extremely long hair is a sexual fetish. If you do it, it is worth many, many, many thousands of dollars. It is a permanent injury, even though it doesn’t cause physical pain. The nurses did it for free and probably TOOK her hair and did who knows what with it. So anyway, this coworker told me she woke up when the drugs wore off and her long hair was gone. But, stupidly, she never bothered to grow it long again, and kept it cut very short for the rest of her life. That just tells me that she’s too stupid to appreciate or understand the importance of long hair. Who cares if they even cut it off, because she’s too stupid to appreciate it and too stupid to sue them for a million dollars – she never wanted long hair anyway and was too stupid to deserve it.

Anyway, Mom wanted me to get Medicaid, but I think the less insurance I have, the safer I am. If you don’t have insurance, they are less likely to take advantage of the opportunity to give you dozens and dozens of unnecessary and harmful treatments for free. If they are aware that nobody is paying for this, they’ll perhaps give you the minimum necessary, which gives you a better chance of survival. You have a greater chance of death, dismemberment, poisoning, cancer, and everything else the more medical treatments you receive, because medicine is death, in every way.

I should probably post this and start thinking about getting ready for work. I don’t have to go hunting to find Max today – he’s right here beside me. He was out all night instead. He was hanging out with another cat that I call ‘Spot,’ because it has sort of a white underbelly with a darker brown saddle on top. I don’t know if that cat is a stray or if it belongs to someone. They were catching a mouse. The mouse was right there with them and they were letting it run a little bit and then jumping on it again. So I left him out there to do that instead of making him come inside. I want him to socialize with other cats, learn things from them, and learn how to survive outdoors, and he needs to understand how to catch mice. I was fantasizing about making a cat farm, where I would breed millions of mice and release them outdoors on the farm for the cats.

I am not yet settled into this dishwashing job, and I need to get used to getting on the bus at the right time, and that kind of thing. I need to decide if I’m able to do this for the long term. It really does sort of fit with my long term plans, because it has me going by Wegman’s every day, and I wish I actually lived next to Wegman’s so that I’d walk over there and go shopping every day like I do here at Weis. Weis is okay, but they don’t have much selection of organic or exotic foods. Wegman’s has a huge selection of organic, exotic, and fancy-wealthy foods, like salmon caviar, and several types of grassfed meats, and stuff, and these beautiful fruit tarts. I don’t have any money and won’t have enough money merely from working one job. I will have to get a second job, otherwise it’s beans-and-rice for me. Most of my money goes to paying rent.

Yesterday there was a guy helping us, from another restaurant with the same owners. He commented that there was no radio in this kitchen, and asked why not. The other chef said he didn’t know. I hadn’t noticed it, but yeah, it was true, there was no radio in the kitchen! The guy said that EVERY kitchen always had a radio. I hadn’t even appreciated it up to that point, but NOT HAVING A RADIO was making my job calm, peaceful, and relaxing, instead of tortured and angry for hours. I HATE THE RADIO. I HATE IT, I HATE IT, I HATE IT, I WANT TO SMASH IT AGAINST THE WALL. I was FORCED to listen to the radio for YEARS when I worked at McDonald’s. They had an intercom radio, but at one point, that wasn’t working, so they brought in a radio and just tuned it to The Bus. The Bus has a small, limited playlist where they play the same songs over and over again in a 24 hour period, and these are OLDIES which have been playing for DECADES, so I have already heard all of these songs 100,000 times in my life, and now, I must hear each one again every 24 hours. It was torture, and I am not joking – it was literally torture. I hated that music. I had to hear the worst of the oldies, including Michael Jackson and other filth, played over and over every day. I had to hear ‘Fat Bottomed Girls You Make The Rockin’ World Go Round’ every day. And that song was written by someone who was gay and didn’t even like girls, just like ‘Billie Jean Is Not My Lover, Cause She’s Just A Girl, Not A Cute Little Boy,’ and other filth written by people who didn’t even mean it. Then, the voices in my head would force me to hear those same songs being replayed in my head all day afterwards. It was not possible to avoid the music when the soul murderers forced me to continue hearing it playing in my head.

I should post this. I need to start getting ready. I was just saying that it hadn’t occurred to me that there was no radio, and I suddenly realized how precious and wonderful that was. It should be illegal to expose your coworkers to secondhand radio, which is just as harmful as secondhand tobacco smoke. It is a hazardous work environment.

I am drinking lots of Coke today. It is a food substitute. I don’t have good food at home right now, and what little I have hasn’t been prepared. I could boil the crayfish and make soup, like I saw them doing with lobster pieces yesterday. He boiled the lobster pieces in a huge pot to make lobster bisque. It was the heads and shells and everything, after the tails were removed. That’s what Weston Price is all about, making stock out of leftover parts of meats and fish and bones.

I’m grouchy because of all this Coke, the lack of food, the lack of sleep last night, the lack of being settled in and used to this job, the lack of money – I just keep wanting food and not having any. I’m eating leftover raw tuna at work, and it is surprisingly satisfying. It kept me alive all night yesterday even though I really only had a few small bites and not much else to eat, although I also had pecan pie which someone brought in. I get free food there, and it’s potentially nice food. I also ate a little bit of Brie cheese off someone’s plate, the side that wasn’t bitten off of, but found that for some reason, it instantly triggered mucus production in my throat – it was allergenic somehow, which indicates bad quality. Perhaps it was left at room temperature too long. I don’t know the conditions it was in, or how long it sat at the table or how long it sat out during preparation. That would explain why people weren’t eating it. It never triggered instant mucus production when I bought it at the grocery store.

I’m obsessed with food because I didn’t really have breakfast, just a few small snacks and Coke. I’ll get through this. I’m off tomorrow and Monday. I don’t know what I’ll be doing long term. I hope to learn more cooking there too, not just dishwashing.

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